new start
by cats 'n' bats
Summary: Though no matter all the downsides of what was happening there was a good thing to think about, new life, new start and a new home. I was all I wanted for ...now." Alex downly is a new student in forks high school, but new things bring new dangers..
1. home

**I sadly ********do not own twilight or any of its characters…Stephanie mayers owens it all.**

**Chapter 1**

**"Going back to get away**

** After everything has changed**

** Everything has changed"**

**Paramore-franklin**

Forks. Small, green and miserable, home sweet home. No matter where you are in the world it all seems to be the same…well maybe not a dessert, but I'm not complaining. I stared at the window of my new silver range rover, staring at the house I would be living in for next few years. Though no matter all the downsides of what was happening there was a good thing to think about, new life, new start and a new home. I was all I wanted for now.

I unpacked my bags and once again stared around me, the house was small but I was a 17 year old buying my first house. Six o'clock in the morning. I had school soon, at least I finished packing.

I grabbed my favourite pair of black skinnies, my new drop dead shirt, my black waistcoat and my vans. I checked myself in the mirror before leaving the house. The cold humidity hit me hard when I opened the door. It's way to cold…maybe even colder then home.

Arriving at my new school was not scary just intimidating, it seemed like no-one had ever seen a new girl before. My day had just got better. I opened the door to find a gangly boy with black hair smiling widely at me.

"I'm Eric," his hand extended out to me, I took it quickly and shook it. "You must be the new girl. Alexia"

"Yeah, it's just Alex thanks" I politely smiled back. He started to walk as I did.

"So, what's your first lesson then?" I laughed lightly; he gave me a questioning gaze.

"Sorry, I don't know yet, I need to go to the office." He nodded quickly and stared once again.

"Your not American are you?" I shook my head, I looked to my side.

"I'm British actually, I moved here 'cause my mum died and I have some family here." He sighed and patted my back as in to say a silent sorry.

Eric soon pointed me the way to the office, I thanked him. Walking into the small warm room felt so strange from the wide cold school. The walls were a warm yellow as was the chairs.

A woman sat silently behind the desk, old, blond hair and with glasses bigger then her face. I walked silently to goggle women. "I'm Alex Downly, and I was wondering if you had my timetable?" she seemed to glare for a moment before pulling a piece of paper out and shoving it in my face. I hurried out of the room afraid she was going to eat me.

After five long lessons of gym(which I accidentally knocked the coach out with a volleyball) government, Jefferson, Trigonometry and Spanish; I finally could eat. I went along with my new friends I had picked up Eric, Jessica and the overly annoying but sweet Mike.

As we sat down talking about some type of beach la push or something, I noticed the room go cold. I turned and saw them. There were five of them. Though food sat before them none of them ate but sat there like five abnormal gods in a room of peasants.

One of them turned to look at me. His eyes were dark, his blonde hair styled amazingly; even though his beauty was stunning, his look was almost that of a predator staring at its prey. We stared for what seemed like hours, the room silent to us, fear filled his eye. I felt hypnotised by him.

The tension was quickly-and sadly- broken by Jessica who was from my Spanish class.

"You having a stare off with one of the Cullens?" I was still renouncing my self from the shock.

"Who is he?" she smiled.

"That would be Jasper hale, with his family of hot gods and girls. They're all together anyway, like dating. Except Jasper; the blonde one. I wouldn't get your hopes up though. I thinks he's like scared of people." she sighed.

"Scared?" I quoted, she nodded in response "if you say so, but why does he look like he's going to eat me?" she stared at me her smiles gone.

"Maybe he's a vampire and you're his next victim" we both laughed at the ridiculousness of her explanation.

I turned to look at him once again, he mouthed something to me…"maybe"

**This is my first fan fiction so if it's bad do tell :/ but if it's good then hallelujah ******

**(it might be a bit short I think…)**


	2. the way he makes you feel

**I sadly :( ****do not own twilight or any of its characters…Stephanie meyers owns it all.**

**Chapter 2**

**"I noticed your eyes are always glued to me**

****

Keeping them here

And it makes no sense at all"

Paramore-crush crush crush.

"Maybe" I repeated, no one seemed to listen except him, I stepped up from my seat and walked to the door waving to my friends. Pushing the door too, I walked to the wall furthest from the cafeteria. I noticed a small dispute between Jasper and the rest of the cullens. As Jasper looked my way I quickly turned my head. I took a quick glance back, he was walking towards me…

"hello." He stood perfectly in front of me…what the fuck am I going to say??...

"Umm…hi." I forced a smile; I looked like a total idiot. He smiled, his smile was slanted lightly.

"I'm jasper." I nodded and stared…act cool.

"I know who you are." He stared at me, oh god I sounded like a stalker.

"well who are you then, or shouldn't I ask?"

"I'm Alex, and I'm not a stalker…just," I stuttered. "Just to make that clear" I smiled stupidly again.

"I guess that is nice to know, no chance of you watching me at night then." I looked passed his shoulder, his brother was glaring at me…Ed…Ed…Edward I think his name was.

"no, but they may be a chance of me being eaten alive." He stared at me shocked, his eyes going darker like a black; instead of the warm golden colour. "It's just your brother looks annoyed with either me or you." He seemed to look happier after that. There was a silence, in the corner of my eye I saw Edward turn away from us.

"Just ignore him. Edward has been a bit on the moody side today." He smiled; I nearly melted in the sight of it. "So you're new here??" I nodded, unable to speak due to the effects of his beauty. "What made you move all the way over here??"

"Well my mum died so I moved to live with the only family I had, my dad" his hand seemed to move slightly but then returned to its original place.

"I'm sorry, how did she die??" I shrugged and sat miserably on the floor. The subject of my mum was hard for me, we were very close. I had to watch her die before me, screaming blood everywhere. The face I remember most was his face, the hunger in his eyes. The blood stained gingery hair. The worst day I will ever encounter.

"She was killed, they're still search for the killer" After a moment of silence, he silently sat next to me.  
"I hope they find who ever did it." I look to his face, he look as if he was in a lot of pain. I had depressed him probably.

"Same…so what do you have next?" he seemed to stares into some unknown place for a while.

"Biology." He turned and smiled at me, I could still see the pain in his eyes.

"Same." He laughed, oh god he had the cutest laugh I have ever heard.

"You should sit next to me, I wouldn't mind." I nodded, it took a lot not to scream and do a happy dance.

"If you think I should I will" I think that was more cool then the happy dance I had in mind. He gave me that breathtaking smile again. He stood up, looking quite proud of himself.

"I think you should" He slowly put his hand out to me, he was bracing himself for something, rejection maybe?

"If you say so." I reached out to take his hand, as our hands met everything stopped. His ice cold skin froze me and the world around. As our eyes met he slowly pulled me up; I noticed he wasn't breathing but he seemed fine.

"your very cold." He still had hold of my hand but his eyes avoided mine.

"It must be the weather." I smiled and nodded. I started to stare at our hands, they were still together. He reluctantly let go and started to walk toward the door. He turned quickly to face me. "Are you not coming?"

"Yeah, sorry." I shuffled quickly to his side, longing to be closer to him. I followed silently. I know I had just met him, but I feel as if we are connected somehow. I think I'm already falling in love. Either that or I'm just over reacting to his amazing beauty like some crazed fan.

"You are being very quiet, are you okay?" I smiles at him, to reassure him I was okay. He eyes seemed to be darkening ever so slightly.

"I'm very good, I was just thinking about stuff." I noticed people giving us quick glances as we walked through the halls of the school. I avoided any contact with every one except Jasper. I wasn't obsessed by him that I only wanted to him, I'm just shy and I didn't know these people.

**Well that took a while. To write :/ just didn't have time. But hey I finished this chapter at last :)**** hope you like it and that.**


	3. biology

**I sadly ******** do not own twilight or any of its characters…Stephanie Meyer owns it all. **

**Chapter 3**

**"But hold your breath,**

**Because tonight will be the night,**

**that i will fall for you."**

**Secondhand serenade- fall for you**

My last lesson had just started, biology but I was loving it. I got to sit next to the amazing beauty god, Jasper. Mr Banner had finally decided to show up to class, he seemed nicer then my previous teachers. He had that nice, funny look that made him seem nice; hopefully he will be.

I kept staring at Jasper, his carefully styled blond hair, perfect skin and deep eyes. I sighed through pure joy.

"Okay, today we are going to watch a video on Cellular Ultra-structures. Here we go" Mr Banner quickly turned off the lights and began the video on the screen before us. It had just started talking about the structure of Eukaryotic Cells or something like that.

"So where did you move from? I'm guessing England." Jasper whispered quietly to me, I turned to him looking a little jaded.

"What gives you that impression?" I retorted back, a little louder. I smiled to reassure him that I wasn't being morose about it.

"Well your accent sort of gives it I way." He answered in an obvious tone.

"Oh, yeah. I seem to forget that sometimes." He chuckled lightly and looked down.

"So do you like the weather?" I stared at him. That's a random question, the weather? Why would I care about the stupid weather when he's here?

"Yeah, I know it's weird but I like the cold, I like water. I love snow. It does snow here right?" He nodded, smiling as if liking cold things pleased him.

"It snows," his smile was more amazing then the last time I saw it. "So, what's your favourite colour?"

"Red and black. What's with all the random questions about random things?" he looked to the video for a moment then gazed at me.

"I just want to get to know you. Is that okay?" I nodded. Anything's okay if it's him. I'd murder for him. "What would you say to coming to port angeles with me later?"

I froze, was this going to be a date, he's asking me out on a date? I was lost for words, at least he likes me. Maybe he'll want to be with me. Oh please do. One day here, I have new dreams that have already been fulfilled.

"I would say that I would love to come to Port Angeles with you, where ever that may be." He wrote something down, I couldn't read it but I could tell his handwriting was very neat; almost like that out of an old Victorian book. I looked back at the screen; the video was finishing up on Prokaryotic Cells. I had made no notes on it; luckily I had studied it in my old school back in England, well I had done an exam on it.

The lights suddenly came on; Mr Banner looking very cheerful sat down and excused us from the class. I stood up and turned to walk away hoping not to trip in front of anyone; Jasper unexpectedly caught my hand as I moved.

"I'll pick you up at six." He let go and swiftly walked past me. He had left a piece of paper in my hand:

_"Remember 6 o'clock._

_306-855-7905_

_Jasper."_

He gave me his number? What does he think I'm going to do cancel? Even if I had Necrotizing fasciitis*, I wouldn't cancel. I stared at it for a moment, I felt very smug.

"what's that?" Mike was looking over my shoulder, looking very intriged in my piece of paper.

"Oh it's nothing, what's up?" He looked at the paper once more then returned my glance with a happier face.

"Well," We started walking out the room, I was sure Jessica would be here any minute. It is quite obvious that she has a crush on him. "I was wondering if you wanted to go see a movie? With me? Tonight?" He looked so happy asking me, I sighed. I hope he doesn't take reject to much. As I was about to answer, Jessica quickly walked in on us.

"What you talking about?" She seemed a little suspicious of me.

"Mike was just asking me if I thought that you would go see a movie with him." Mike shot me a questioning look.

"really?" She looked so happy, I hope Mike goes along with this or I may have to hit him.

"Yes. He thought he should take you out as I'm going out with Jasper tonight." I hope he gets the message it's plain obvious. He nods in agreement. Thank god.

"Your going on a date with Jasper Hale?" The shock in her face annoyed the hell out of me. Just 'cause she couldn't get a date with doesn't mean I can't. What does she think she is? Miss perfect, well she has a big nose…ish. Okay she has a nice nose but that isn't the point.

"I wouldn't say it was a date. He asked if I would go to port angeles and I said yes." She attached herself to a anoyed looking mike. I shrugged and quickened my pace. I needed to get home and get ready. I only have about 2 hours or so. I also have to face my dad, he was never keen on me dating boys, well he was never keen on boys being my friends either. Who knew there would be so much to going out with a boy(an amazingly beautiful one at that) for one night.

I fumbled in my bag for my car keys, the amount of stuff I thought I needed wasn'y helping in finding them. I dropped my bad, with a grunt I started picking up all my stuff. I looked out into the forest, something very fast moved through the small meadow by the school, it looked a bit like a bear but faster. It must be my imagination, super fast bear what a joke.

I finally spotted my keys, with swift movements I had already opened the car and started it. The excitement was bubbling in me. A night with Jasper Hale this can not be real.

**I wasn't sure whether I was going to continoue this story but well I gave it anther chapter to see how ot goes. Hope you enjoyed it ********  
* Necrotizing fasciitis is a flesh eating disese(just thought you might want to know)**

**(Sorry if there is any bad spellings, I can't spell much:/)**


	4. freedom

**I sadly ******** do not own twilight or any of its characters…Stephanie Meyer owns it all, it's not fair******

**Chapter 4 **

**"Take our tears, put them on ice.**

**'cause i swear i'll burn ****This city down**

** to show you the light"**

**Sophomore Slump-Fall out boy**

What to wear? I had never had this problem; I usually just pick whatever the hell I found. Now I'm worried that I might not look good enough, this was going to be fun. I pulled out my black dress with the yellow bow. I stared at myself in the mirror.

"Nope I look like I'm going a funeral." I through it onto my bed and pulled out my purple skinny jeans and black v-neck top. I shook my head and through that to the pile of wrong occasions.

"You going somewhere?" the familiar deep voice-which always came with a problem-had just entered.

"Yes I am Dad. What do you want?" I pulled out an old yellow dress, it was a horrible yellow. The bin had a new fashion statement to hold now.

"Where you going and who with?" I pressed my black mini skirt to my hips, it looked sort of good. I put it down next to me.

"Port angel, angeles. I got asked to go down tonight with…someone." I was careful not to specify the gender of my dazzling god.

"And this "someone"," he made quotation marks in the air. "Would be…?" he paused hoping for an answer. I took a breath and gazed at his feet.

"Jasper hale" His face seemed confused and a little stunned.

"Dr Cullen's kid?" I nodded, he scratched his neck the way he always did when he was thinking. The problem was what he was thinking? "Well you're wearing pants and that's finale." That's it; all I have to do is wear pants? I guess that's fine.

"Red or black?" He looked to the jeans I was holding, he scratched his neck once more and pointed at the red. I nodded and put them in the "wearing pile". I pulled out my silk purple corset and smiled at it. Before I could put it down, he took it of me.

"A shirt would be better, for my sake." He looked like a pleading puppy; I'm the one who's meant to give those looks not him.

We both settled on a panic! At the disco shirt to wear, he left me to change; well I forced him to leave. I was dressed and all I had to do was sort this mess of blond hair, well a dirty blond I would say. I hastily straightened my hair so it looked all silky, as silky looking as I could get. Yawning I looked towards my clock which sat ticking on my dark walls. Six o'clock. He'll be here any more moment.

My train of thought was ended by the ringing of the door bell. I jumped out of my paralysed state swiftly. Half way down the stairs I wondered how he new where I lived, I let it go and carried on to the door almost dancing.

I opened it slowly for a little effect, I liked a bit of drama and slow opening doors to what probably would be a sex god is a lot of drama. Well for me anyways.

"Hello." He smiled that divine smile with his godly face.

"Hi Jasper." It came out more like a slur of words.

"You ready?" I nodded; I took my first steps with a huge grin on my face.

"Wait." I stopped unexpectedly, what now? "You better take care of her or I will make sure you go home with out a head…or limbs." I felt like screaming at him but I quickly calmed myself, well I think I did.

"Dad I'll be fine." I hurried to Jaspers car, it was a black Mercedes. I liked it, must be fast. That means less time with him in a confined space.

I got in the car looked at the soft leather around me, I smelt that new car smell, and gas. I stared through the front window, the black darkness of night.

It made me think, being here, no parents, no rules and no worries. I always had to make sure everything was okay, that nothing went wrong. I would watch over what my mother did, she loved to do dangerous stunts. Everyday I would go through the something, worrying she might get hurt or worse. I worried that she would get fired after all the off days she pulled. Everyday I would sit staring at walls or doing my homework, depressed of worrying. The stress I went through at home, I was never liberated. For some reason, I sit here with this boy who I have just about met, with no care in the world. I felt safe with him as if he could rid me of any pain. He would protect me from all that came. I knew that every person seeks. No matter who or where you are, you always look for it even if you don't know it. You'll look around meet every persons eye till that pull; the magnetic pull between two people when there eyes met. You could control as you can't control destiny. I had found my destiny; I had found the greatest treasure that has ever existed. I had found freedom.

"You haven't spoken at all. What you thinking about?" I stared at him, my whole realization of what I had found, had taken me nearly half the journey to think about. The whole time, we were both silent.

"Just stuff, nothing important." I lied.

"Are you sure cause you seemed a little depressed, then you just went joyful." He seemed confused as if he had never seen someone be this…joyful as he put it.

"I was just realising something, that's all." I reassured him.

"If you say so, I thought we could take a detour before we went to where we're meant to be going. Is that okay?" he seemed a little scared of what I would say; I was only curious now of where we were.

"Where are we going to then?" He gave a sigh of relief before returning to his optimistic state once more.

"Well its place I like to think, relax. It's beautiful at night with the stars out." The car stopped gracefully without a hint of a tyre screech. I looked out and a moonlight path lay by the car. We were surrounded by nothing but trees, I must have spaced out for longer then I thought.

"We going up there" I pointed towards the path, he nodded. He got out and came to my side of the car in an inhuman speed. I just passed it off as me seeing things. Politely he opened my door and held a hand out to me.

"Would you care to walk with me darling." He put on a charming southerner accent.

"Well I would love to kind sir." I answered with my best cockney accent, which was pretty bad. He took my hand and locked the car. His hands were still as cold as they were before. I may buy him some gloves because he feels ice cold. I sort of liked his coldness though.

"You don't mind walking through here do you, because if you don't want to I'll take you to Port Angeles?" I walked ahead of him making sure our hands didn't leave each other.

"I don't mind a bit, now come on I want to see what ever you want to show me." His smile was bigger then before, he carefully pulled me along the trees. I watched in every direction there was. I didn't really like being in the middle of a bear infested forest. For some reason I still felt safe with Jasper here. He may just be human but still I felt secure.

**I think I might put the next chapter in Jasper's point of view but I'm not sure yet. i decided that I am going to finish this story. I'm not sure who that pleases really. I just hoped you like it. **


	5. it's just me

**Obviously I sadly ******** do not own twilight or any of its characters…Stephanie Meyer owns it all, it's not fair:( At least i own some of the characters in this like Alex and Dave:)**

**This chapter is in Jasper point of view, enjoy. **

**Chapter 5**

**"And this is wrong, but who am I to judge**

***You* feel like heaven when we touch**

**I guess for me this is enough"**

**Metro Station - Seventeen forever**

She was so happy; I could feel waves of it pouring from her. Not one hint of fear just happiness. It's as if she thought I was completely human. I would have to tell her the truth soon; she would probably scream and run away from me. I stared at our entwined hands; my ice cold skin didn't seem to bother her either. A sudden vibration came from my back pocket, I pulled my phone out. Edward.

"Alex, I just need to answer this, it's my brother." She smiled, a wave of reluctance came across me as i let go of my hand. I quickly walked behind a tree and flipped my phone open.

"What?" I could tell he was angry, his unneeded breathing was hissing out of the phone.

"Where are you? Your not with that girl are you?" I looked to where Alex was sat, waiting anxiously. She looked stunning when she was being impatient.

"No, I'm out hunting. That's all." I could hear mumbling through the phone, I could tell it was Alice her high voice was unmistakeable.

"Alice says she had a vision of you with her, in the middle of a forest." Well that's not really the future, it's the present. I bit my lip lightly; a small droplet of venom came out. I wiped it away and ignored the high amounts of it in my mouth.

"No, it's just me all alone, with a few deer." I heard Edward sigh, I don't understand why he's so worried, it's not like I'm going to eat her, I hope. The hissing pain in my throat was getting stronger; I ignored it as usual, not without difficulty.

"Fine, but if you care about this family you will stay away." I put the phone down; clearly I care about my family, why does he think I'm living off animal blood. I took a breath and returned to Alex, she was sitting silently her mouth mouthing something.

"What you saying?" she looked lost for a moment then smiled.

"Just singing to myself really, I do that often." I walked up to her so we were face to face. She looked so innocent, like a young infant, her little smile, and her blushing red cheeks against her ivory skin. I brushed her cheek with the back of my hand; she was so warm and delicate. With a flick of my hand I could break her, as if she was a porcelain doll.

"What song would that be?" I could feel her heart beat faster, her emotions were confusing me. Fear? Lust? Confusion? Had she figured it out, does she know I'm dangerous?

"It's just me." She said breathless with a little tune to it. I had never heard of this song, I stroked her brownie blond hair, it was smooth like silk.

"Would you care to sing me a few words?" She nodded, still breathless. Her staring made me just want to…kiss her. I had never had these feeling, especially to a human.

"Take the air from my lungs. Take the heart from my soul. I'm not one for the crowd to see. It's just 's just… Just a little more come on and satisfy me. Just a little more come on and terrify me. Just a little more and I'll be done with my life and then I'll feel ok" It sounded a lot like some kind of evil circus song, but she made it sound like an angels song. Her voice was even amazinger with tune to it.

"Nice." I could barely speak, our noses were paractily touching. I could feel the warmth of her breath on my face.

"Are you taking me to this place or what?" I took her hand gently and gave a mischevous smile. I pulled her as humanly fast as I could. She was laughing as I pulled her along, huge waves of excightment were crushing me, but I liked them.

"Here we are." I smiled and extened my arms out to show the cliff edge. It was large flat cliff edge. There were daisy flowers every where like a minture meadow. I watched her walk to the edge in amazement. She stared out to the dim lit town of port angeles below. The moon was huge and bright, the light reflected off her skin like mine in the daylight. It reminded me of what could happen. I could kill her just for blood. Treat like anther aanimal to feast on. I didn't want that.

"it's beautiful, how did you find this place?" She sat down staring at the horizon, she was so calm. I sat next to her slowly as if she was some scared animal I didn't want to frighten away.

"I just went for a walk and found it." Well truthfully I was hunting a bear and found it, but she didn't need to know details really.

"I love it here. Can we stay here and just talk?" I wanted to do the same. I just wanted to touch once more, I slowly and nervously reached my hand out to touch her face she didn't move.

"You know, it's not good for your heath to be around me." I needed to warn her, make sure she still wanted to be here if she knew that her life would be in danger. I wanted her to be independent in her choices.

"Why's that? You wouldn't hurt me, would you?" I slided my hand behind her neck and pulled her gently towards me.

"I might not be able to control myself." She leaned closer to me, I breathed unnessersary breaths onto her face.

"I don't mind if you loose control." She doesn't know what she's saying. If I lost control she'd be dead. I would never forgive myself if I hurt her in anyway. I cupped her face in my cold white hands, stroked her gently.

"You don't want that." She put her hand on mine, her thumb rumbed circles in to it. I gazed at it, my scars were shining underneath her touch. If only she knew.

"What if I do?" she moved closer, our heads nearly touching. I could feel the warmth of her blood rushing beneath her skin, my throat raging with thirst. The venom was swirling hysterically around in my mouth. I tensed I was loosing control fast.

Before I could do anything I ran at vampiric speed under tree breathing needlessly against it. I hit the tree with my fist leaving a large dent in its trunk. I took a few more breaths and turned to look at Alex. She was petrified, gaping at me her hand still on her face where my hand had been. I could tell she was shaking.

"Jasper?" she whispered breathlessly. I ran at human speed towards her and dropped myself in front of her.

"I'm sorry, I got nervous. I'm so sorry." She touched my hand, I was sensing waves of rejection and confusion. "I really like you and I don't want to hurt you." She looked hurt anyways.

"How did you do that?" She had noticed the speed. Shit. I took her hand and put a façade of confusion on my face.

"Do what?" i questioned as if I didn't know what she was talking about.

"Run, that fast? It was like superman fast." She was comparing me to a hero. I sighed.

"I ran at normal speed Alex, your imagining things." I smiled hoping she would buy it.

"I must be, sorry. It must have been the shock of you running away." I laughed, she had bought it but I could still sense she was suspicious of me.

"It's getting late your dad must be getting worried about you." I needed to hunt and this was the only excuse I could think of.

"His name is David." She gave a small giggle and stood up. Her movements were very clumsy like, as if every move she made would hurt her.

"Well we better get you back to him then," I stood up and took her hand. "Would one like a ride?" she blushed, she looked striking with her rosy cheeks. Her distinctive smell was like no other. Humans usually smell all the same but she, she smelled of sweet cherry blossoms in bloom.

"One would." She used a cockney accent which was adorable. I picked her up and slung her gently across my back. Her arms twisted around my neck, her legs either side of me. I must not loose control…in any shape or form. I held her up by her legs, my hands gently wrapped around her thighs, blood pumping faster on my touch.

"Comfortable?" I could feel her nodding. Her excitement was a lot to take but the small amounts of lust rolling off her were almost unbearable.

* * *

I made quick work of the walk down; I made sure I didn't go to quick to make her any more suspicious. I let her down reluctantly as we got to the car. She got into the car quickly, she was probably cold.

I got into my side of the car and turned the heating up; this was the first time it had been used. She looked thankful for the heat; I wouldn't want her catching a cold either.

I give her one last glance before driving into the darkness back to her house where I would have to let her go. That would be harder then I first thought.

**Well that was my first bash at jasper view of their "first date" I hope it was good because if it wasn't, well then that was a waste of time. Well I enjoyed writing it so I hope you liked reading it :)**** the song Alex(who is all my character) sung was escape the fate-it's just me.(I'm also thinking of changing the title of the story, if you have any ideas feel free to tell me :):))**


	6. if your a man at all

**Obviously I sadly ****L**** do not own twilight or any of its characters…Stephanie Meyer owns it all, it's not fair****L**

**Apov**

**Chapter 6**

**"But you think that I can't see**

**What kind of man that you are,**

**If you're a man at all."**

**Decode-Paramore  
**

He was quiet in the car. After the shock he gave me, I've been thinking about things. Maybe I was wrong, I must be wrong. I have to ask him before its too late.

"jaspers?" I asked him nervously.

"Yes, what is it dear?" I answered politely, how could I be thinking this.

"Are you human?" I looked at him, he looked as if he wasn't breathing. He stared absentmindedly into the darkness.

"Maybe." Well that's a no, what is he. I didn't dare to ask anther question. I knew I wouldn't want to know the answer to it. He isn't superman because, his hair I much better. He can't be spider man or batman because they are all like old. Maybe he doesn't age. I sighed, I don't think I care what he is as long as he is with me I'm happy.

"We're here." He didn't look at me, just walked out the car and let me out. His hand was out for me to take, I hesitated before taking it. I held it firmly staring at him. he avoided eye contact again. We walked silently to my door.

"You okay?" He finally looked at me, his hand slid around my neck.

"I'm fine, it's just I'm going to have to let you go now." I smiled, he was going to miss me, and hopefully tomorrow he will still be human to me. We stared silently at each other, nothing else would be heard but our breathing; mainly my breathing.

"Are you just going to stand there staring, or are you coming in." My Dad was leaning casually in the doorway. Jasper released his hand from my neck, slowly tracing my skin and then dropping it to his side.

"I'll be in, in a minute." I waved a hand at him, not releasing my eyes from Jasper's face. He shook his head lightly and returned into the house mumbling to himself.

"May I have the honour of calling you tonight?" He tilted his head. I put both hands up to tell him to wait there. I rushed into the house, ignoring my dad's annoying comments, and grabbed the first plain piece of paper I saw; which luckily had a pen on top of it. I wrote down my number hastily before then rushing, nearly falling at the same time, to Jasper.

"You may." Out of breath I passed him the piece of paper. He seemed amused by easily out of breath-ness.

"Thank-you, see you tomorrow?" I nodded. He kissed my head and walked charmingly to his car. I watched him drive away before returning to my house. I silently walked to the stairs hoping my dad would leave me be. As I got to my room I guessed my dad had fallen asleep.

I sat infront of my laptop, as I waited for it to turn on I wondered, what exactly was I expecting to find? What exactly would I google to get the answer?

The screen lit up I clicked the internet and stared at the black box in which I had to wright. I tapped the side thinking over again, till it came to me. I finally typed cold skinned

I waited I looked through the results, I was sure he wasn't a lizard, suddenly I saw it. Myth the cold skinned. I clicked on it. A picture of a white devil like monster appeared. Other results had come up as well immortal. Then there was one that made sense to me. Fast runner.

I clicked on that, a picture of a group of people eating a young girl appeared. I read the information given, it all sounded familiar. I came to me he was human…past tense. He wasn't now, it explains the eyes, the lack of breathing; he was never out of breath. He said he was bad for my health, he meant he could kill me.

I tourned the computer off, staring into nothing-ness. Am I scared of him? I wasn't, even now that I know who he is, I'm not scared. I smiled. I had a vampire boyfriend! Well boyfriend to be.

I changed into my silk nightie, and sat in my bed. I felt happy and relaxed, now I just needed to tell him that I knew exactly what he was. My mobile started to vibrate on my nightstand. It must be Jasper.

I flipped my phone open, "Hello?" I could hear wind through the phone, he was out side?

"Alex? It's me Jasper." I smiled I knew it was him.

"where are you?" I giggled lightly.

"out for a walk." I heard a cracking noise, both on the phone and out side.

"Where exactly in a specific tree maybe?" I heard him inhale fast.

"how'd you know I'm in a tree?" I walked to my window and opened it.

"you not as stealthy as you think." There was a dark shape in the tree. A lot like the shape of a seventeen year old boy.

"Your good." I smirked at him he leaned closer, the light from my lamp glowed on his face.

"You want to come inside?" he smiled sweetly, I went and sat on my bed. He jumped in without so much as a bump. He walked quietly over to me, I stood up so I could see his face clearly. He looked me up and down, his mouth slightly a jar. "What?"

"nice outfit." I looked down, I just noticed that my nightie only just covered everything mainly with lace and black silk. Well that was all it was made for.

"Oh sorry, I wasn't expecting visitors." He looked a little embarresed, if he was alive he would be blushing.

"I'll go, if you want." I took his hand and smiled, I think it's time for a little fun.

"Where you gunna go? Maybe stalk the streets looking for a little meal?" he looked very confused by what I was saying. I'll have to drop bigger hints then.

"What you mean?" his hand reached for my face, he traced my cheek with his fingers.

"Jasper, your skin is cold, you run like really fast. You hardly breathe, I've never heard you heart beat once. You think your dangerous. It's quite easy to google all this you know." I felt his hand tense on my face, I avoided his eyes.

"You found through google?" I nodded, he laughed it was more of a oh my god laugh. He seemed to be waiting for something with a depressed look to him.

"I'm scared that you're a vampire you know. You won't hurt me. I know it." He cupped my face in both of his hands. He leaned in on me, our faces close.

"I could kill you. One day I might not be able to control my self." I put my hands on his chest, I stared into his eyes.

"I don't care. I just want to be with you." He lightly pushed me forward, I sat on my bed. My face still in his hands. I closed my eyes waiting for him but the pressure from my face disappeared. I opened my eyes he was gone now where to be seen.

"What are you doing?" My dad was standing just out side my door, so he was hiding.

"Yoga, it's a new thing. All American girls are doing it now." He looked a little weired out, he knows how I feel.

"Well get some sleep. Okay?" I nodded, he left with a wave. I sighed Jasper had gone, I sat in the middle of my bed staring into darkness.

"Alex? You didn't think I would leave just like that?"

**well, she figured it out. i always found google handy so maybe this was a good use for it eh? :) hope you enjoyed it:)))**


	7. Till the truth

**Obviously I sadly ****L**** do not own twilight or any of its characters…Stephanie Meyer owns it all, it's not fair****L**

**Apov**

**"Stay with me **

**This is what i need, ****please"**

**My heart-paramore**

"Alex? You didn't think I would leave just like that?" Jasper was standing in the doorway of my closet. He walked silently towards me.

"You hid in my closet? You need to stop watching movies." He chuckled softly, he sat on my bed in front of me.

"There something I really want to do but I'm not sure I can control myself. With all the blood lust and all" I stared wondering what it was he wanted to do, well it's better to try then to never know.

"I give you permission to do whatever you have in mind." He smiled, his hand reached for my face as his other for my waist. He leaned in close pulling me towards him.

"You can stop all this you know, one word and you'll never have to see me again." I hooked my arms around his neck and stared into his liquid gold eyes.

"I will never want to be rid of you, ever." He smiled a wicked grin.

"You'll regret ever saying that." Before I could argue back his cold lips crushed against mine. The coldness of his skin singed against my warmth. Our lips started to move together in perfect synchronization. He pulled me closer to his body. Then suddenly he pushed me down so he was on top of me. My hands were in his hair pulling his face closer to mine. I traced his bottom lip with my tongue. He answered my request as his mouth opened to let my tongue explore his mouth. He suddenly pulled away so I could see him.

His eyes were completely black, his mouth slightly ajar. I wasn't frightened of this though, his hand tightened on my waist till sharp pains rushed from were he was holding me. "Jasper, your holding me to tight." He didn't move, he had stopped breathing altogether. We stared silently at each the pain not effecting my emotional show.

Finally Jaspers eyes started to return to that beautiful liquid gold colour. His hand started to release from my waist, the pain gradually disappeared. I could see the pain in his eyes. "I'm so sorry," He sat up and ran his hand through his hair. "I'm a little confused as well."

I sat up and pulled down my nightie which had risen a little too high. "Confused by what? And it's fine you couldn't help it." I smiled and moved to sit next to him.

"You weren't scared at all, all I felt from you was worry and pain. You were worried I was going to kill you, wasn't you?" I shook my head, I looked at the floor as he stared at me.

"I was worried for you, I didn't know if your okay or what the black eyes mean. Try to remember that I'm new to the vampire thing. I'm new to the closeness thing too." He gently roped his arms around my waist and pulled me in to hug him.

I traced my hand up and down his back as he hugged me, he was shaking slightly. "The black eyes mean I'm." There was a pause as he thought for the right word. "thirsty, and that I just want to…"

"Bite me?" He nodded, I hugged him harder. I think this was the vampire way of crying. He held me close as he dry tears flooded out.

"I should just leave before I do something really stupid." He stood up and headed for my window. I rushed over to him and hugged him.

"Just stay the night we don't have to do anything. We could just sleep." He chuckled, I didn't see what was so funny of him staying the night.

"That would be brilliant, but I don't sleep. I could watch you sleep?" I sat on my bed, no sleep? What exactly would he do all night. He looked a little pained just staring at me. I was a selfish person, making him go through all this pain. My very smell kills him inside.

"You never sleep?" he shook his head. I got under my covers as he walked over to me. He sat lightly on the bed next to me.

"Haven't slept since 1863." I never thought he would be that old, when they said immortal I thought age with a lot of grace not don't age at all.

"I like older guys any way." I yawed; He pushed me down so I could sleep. "Where you going?" I said drowsily.

"I'm staying here, just thought it would be better if I wasn't under the covers. Me being really cold and all." I pulled my covers off and patted the space next to me.

"It's always to hot to sleep in here" He smiled, his arms roped around my waste. Jasper pulled the covers over us. His cold arms around my waist felt safe. His arms like a wall protecting me from all on the other side. I turned so I could snuggle into his chest, he didn't protest.

"What you thinking about?" I smothered my self in his sweet scent which rolled off him.

"The one thing I have been thinking about since the moment I saw you." He started to stroke my hair softly, he wasn't breathing though.

"What's that then?" my eyes started to close on their own, I nearly missed the question.

"You." It was all I managed to slur out of my mouth. The last thing I heard was the calm humming of the god that held me.

**JPOV**

I watched her fall asleep, the smile on her face was calming. She would stur every so often. Her beauty stunned me even now. She sighed calmly in her sleep, these are the times I wished I had Edwards gift. I only wished I knew what she was thinking.

This silence did give me time to think. I was such a monster; I can't control myself near her. Only a few moments ago did I nearly bite her. She wasn't scared; she was only worried for me. She was to selfless, to selfless for her own good.

A sudden vibration came from my back pocket; I looked at the caller id hoping not to disturb Alex. Edward was calling again. I flipped it open reluctantly. "Hello."

"Where are you? Esme is getting worried as is the rest of us." I sighed.

"I'm at Alex's house okay?" I heard a series of muffled chattering.

"Jasper darling, is she okay, are you okay?" Esme, as loving to everyone as usual.

"She's fine, asleep actually. I'm fine too, don't worry I hunted earlier." I heard a sigh escape my mother's lips. More muffles came through.

"Jazzy, you sure you going to be alright?" Alice and her little voice.

"I'm fine, I've never been happier really. Alice I think she's my Edward." I heard gasps and giggles. Obviously Edward wasn't supporting this at all.

"Jasper, she's human, she has a long life ahead of her. Being with you with just endanger her. She will die soon." Edward being pessimistic as usual.

"I know but I want to spend as much time with her as I can. I won't hurt her, I'll hunt everyday. Edward just have a little trust in me please." I was begging him, this probably wouldn't change his mind. Him and his silly religious views. I had had enough of his negative side I just wanted to spend the night with her.

"Jasper?" Alex had woken up, they couldn't just leave us alone.

"See look what you've done, you've woken her up." She stared at me half asleep, oblivious to the world around her.

"Who you on the phone to?" I kissed her forehead, ignoring the searing pain in my throat.

"It's just my family, they're worried about you." She nodded and put her hand on my phone, she kept staring at me. She wanted to talk to them. I sighed and gave her the phone.

APOV

I thanked Jasper as he gave me the phone. "Hello?" I asked sleepily.

"Oh sorry we woke you, it's Edward." Jasper looked very nervous unlike me who just wanted to sleep.

"It's okay, you shouldn't worry about me." I tried to convince Edward, hopefully he'll see sense and trust his brother.

"We have our reasons Alexia, your not safe with Jasper. There are things you don't know." I laughed quietly with a hint of ironicness.

"You should trust your brother more Edward. He has more control then you think." I could hear many voices talking now. "Do you think she knows" it was a high voice that I heard. "He couldn't of told her. If he has rose isn't going to be happy" a very deep male voice came into the convocation I had guessed that was Emmet.

"Hello dear, this is Esme; Jasper's mother. We were all wondering something." She paused I knew what she was going to ask.

"Esme, I know."

**Oooo, what they gunna say?? Hope you liked this chapter, it took a lot longer. I got writers block which can really get on your nerves :/**


	8. bruises and bitemarks

**Obviously I sadly ******** do not own twilight or any of its characters…Stephanie Meyer owns it all, it's not fair******

**Chapter ****7**

"**Bruises and Bite marks say**

**Takes one to bring the pain**

**passion lies in screams of estacitic dreams****?"**

**Bruises and bite marks-good with grenades **

After the long silence I was wondering if I had made a mistake in telling them. Jasper had already covered his face with one hand. I couldn't bare the silence anymore.

"I know that Jasper not meant to stay out this late." There were many relived sighs on the other end, Jasper had decided to look at me instead of his hand. I was hoping they believed me.

"oh that's alright dear, as long as your fine with it we are." I held my hand to my heart and thanked god they did trust me. This was a good start with his family, I'm already lying to them. I passed the phone back to Jasper so I didn't do anything stupid again.

I hid myself under the covers in embarrassment. Jasper was finishing his convocation on the phone, with lots of yes and no's. Finally he said goodbye.

"Why are you hiding, hiding terribly at that." I pulled the covers tighter refusing to come out. If I stayed here no damage would be done to anyone. "Alex." He pulled the covers off me without even a hint of tying. Darn him and his vampire-ness.

"Just let me hide in my shame" I put a pillow over my face. Let me rot here, he probably won't let me do that. I waited in silence nothing cold touch me, no godly voice spoke.

"Who are you talking too?" I crawled out from under my pillow to see my dad staring at me. I looked around, where would he be hiding or maybe he left.

"I must have been talking in my sleep, and throwing things in my sleep too. Sorry." Instead of leaving me to my weirdness, he sat on the side of my bed.

"Is everything all right you've been acting a little strange today? Or is this how you normally act when you were with your mother." I sighed, what was I going to tell. Well I've just found out the guy I like is a vampire; and could possibly kill me. Everything thing was absolutely normal, just throw in a werewolf and this could be Halloween town.

"I've always been like this really dad. You should know me by now. Maybe it's the being in high school thing again. I thought I was out of school but now I'm back." He nodded understandingly. He kissed me good night and brought my cover back to me. I gave an embarrassed smile and pretend to fall asleep as he left.

"You awake?" I sat up to see Jasper crawling on top of me.

"No I'm fast asleep." He chuckled quietly, we didn't want to wake my dad again. He sat next to me, avoiding any eye contact with me.

"I'm sorry about my family, it's because I'm new to this thing." I gave him a questioning look.

"I'll explain in the morning, you need some sleep." I nodded, his arms wrapped around my waist once more. He held me while I drifted off only to dream that he was still holding me.

I woke up silently, two wide eyes were staring at me with such interest. Jasper smiled at me, he looked happier then I had ever seen him. I smiled but a shock of shoot up from my waist.

"I'm going to have a shower, you stay here. Don't move, don't" I got up and tiptoed swiftly to the bathroom.

It was cleaner then I expected, my dad wasn't one of the cleaning type. I guess he liked his bathroom clean. I showed slowly, staring at the hand marked bruises on my waist. I would have to make sure Jasper or anyone saw them. I lightly scrubbed the bruises hoping they would wash away. I was unsuccessful in this useless attempt.

I stared at my self in the mirror, luckily they were the only bruises. I picked up a one of my dad's white towels and wrapped it tight around me. I rushed back hoping Jasper hadn't left, hoping he hadn't decided that I was too human or something like that.

"You stayed…your wearing different clothes too…" I stared as he turned around, his smile left his face as he saw me. I looked around wondering what wiped the smile from his face.

"I ran home and changed. You seem to not be wearing any." I bit my lip and tightened the grip on my towel. He just stared at me, it started to feel a little awkward.

"Yeah I was getting some, I'm sorry." He seemed to scratch his neck and stare at me. I tried to ignore him while I tried to find some clothes.

"I think it's lucky you started on a Friday." I nodded absentmindedly; I picked up my pale yellow dress and black belt. I walked across the room passing jasper who seemed to not be breathing at all.

"What we doing today then?" I pulled out some of my underwear and hid it between my other clothes. I made a flicking motion with my hand to tell him to turn around.

"I was hoping that you would come to my home, to meet my family. They're dying to…" I cut him off quickly.

"Eat me?" he turned round in a swift movement of anger. I was only wearing my under wear, but I knew what the first thing he saw was. The bruises.

"I did that didn't I?" I nodded and grabbed my dress and put it on to hide them. You could still just see them through the fabric. I was thankful for my belt, hopefully his vampiric family won't have see through belts powers.

"It's fine, I'm easily bruised just a poke could bruise me." I lied with a convincing smile. These were my first bruises, even though I have fallen a lot, it never left a mark.

"It's not though, I've already hurt you. All I have to do is touch you." He fell to his knees, even his falls were graceful. I ran to his side and hugged him.

"You haven't hurt me, it's just a mark. Jasper trust me I'm fine don't hate yourself for it." He looked at me his eyes full of pain and self-hate. With a smile I kissed him, trying my best to cheer him up.

"Shall we go then?" I nodded, I had noticed that our situation was a bit like fairy tale; a human girl falls for the blood sucking vampire. He tries to be delicate with her, like a doll of some kind, but he hurts her now and again. I just wanted it to end like a fairy tale, I want him to be my happily ever after. He picked me up and slung me across his back. Within a second he had jumped out the window and started running through the trees. I couldn't make out where we were, everything was a green blur of trees and ferns. The sound of water rushing down some small creek reached my ear. I closed my eyes, to hide my self from the nauseating movements.

"We're here." My head was still buried in his shoulder as he carefully dropped me.

"We're not moving anymore? Are you sure?" I could hear his laughing, something cold touched my lips, I opened to his face upon mine. I snaked my arms around his neck and pulled him closer, trying to deepen the kiss. He pulled away.

"My family are watching us you know." He chuckled and pulled me towards his house. It was huge, windows everywhere, it was like a glass box. The bright walls could be seen. Next to the house was a massive garage, the door fully open. I was amazed to see sports cars and expensive looking ones too.

"Wow." Was all I managed to say.

**Anther chapter done :) woo. Hope it was brilliant for you or just average would be my aim :) :/ i'm unable to upload any more files the stupid think won't let me :(**


	9. meet the family

**I sadly ********do not own twilight or any of its characters…Stephanie mayers owens it all.**

**Obviously I sadly ****L**** do not own twilight or any of its characters…Stephanie Meyer owns it all, it's not fair:(**

**Chapter 9**

**"Stop there and let me correct it,**

**I wanna live life from a new perspective,**

**You can come along because I love your face."**

**Panic! At the disco – New perspective**

I had never been so nervous in my life before. What if they didn't like me, what if they found me annoying. I don't want them to hate me. Jasper was staring at me with concern.

"They're not going to hurt you." I punched him in the arm light so I didn't hurt myself at the same time.

"I'm nervous because they may not like me or find me annoying." He put one of his arms around my waist and pulled me in for a small quick hug.

"They'll love you." I took a breath and cuddled into him as we walked. They probably weren't use to humans being in their home, what if they don't like humans. I remembered the way Edward acted to Jasper when he found out he was with me. I started to shake a little.

"You know eating me would be less nerve racking then this." He chuckled and pushed me forward. My heart started to beat faster as his hand went for the door handle. Before He could open it, the door flung open. I stared at the beautiful, smiling women before me. She was quite young in her mid twenties maybe late. Her caramel coloured hair framing her face perfectly. Just like Jasper her eyes were that golden brown. She was thin but slightly rounded; She wore light colours to match her smiling mood.

"Hello, you must be Alex. I'm Esme" She extended her hand out to me slowly as if not to startle me. I shook her hand gently and smiled courteously.

"It's wonderful pleasure to meet you." I was trying to be polite as I possibly could. I wasn't sure if I was failing but she didn't move a muscle in her face.

"Please come in." We followed her in, my confidence was slowly rising from "they'll hate me" to "I think they won't mind me to much." She walked over and stood next to what must be Dr. Cullen. My Dad had told me about him, he was a good doctor treated my father once before. A bear bite if I recall. I was stunned by his youth, how did they all stay here with out causing suspicion of there no aging-ness.

"Hello Alex" He smiled.

I nodded. "It's nice to meet you Dr Cullen." He chuckled lightly.

"Call me Carlisle." I nodded again, I found it hard phase words in their presence. They reminded me of some fairy tale, Snow white maybe?

I took this time of silence to give a quick survey of the room. It was bright, open. A grand piano lay in the corner of the room in front, a large sofa and chairs lay in the center. There were white roses and lilies everywhere.

"Your house is so beautiful, I've never seen anything like it before. It's so open and bright not to mention grand." Esme seemed especially happy by my comment, she laughed softly, her teeth bright perils as she smiled.

"I designed it myself." I kept staring at the room, I loved the openness of it, it made me feel so calm.

"You should really be a house designer because this place is amazing." She placed her hands together, looking happier then I'd ever seen anyone."

"So we finally get to meet her do we?" the husky voice came from the grand stairs. A heavy built man with black hair came pouncing down the stairs. He was not half as graceful as Jasper. He jogged heavily across the room and swung me into a huge bear hug.

"Your crushing me." I managed to spurt out while being suffocated. He let me down lightly, even though his sized he reminded me of a small three year old.

"Sorry. It's just all the commotion with Jasper being with you and all, I wanted to meet you." I stared, I caused a commotion, and they secretly did hate me. My smile slowly disappeared; Jasper seemed to notice me and gave me a squeeze.

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to cause any trouble." I avoid eye contact with anyone, my guilt was seizing over. I felt like I wanted to cry. I tried to hide all my feelings but everyone seemed to know exactly what they were.

"We don't hate you." I looked up, 3 more Cullens were standing in front of me. The one that spoke was a bronzed hair, golden eyed boy. He seemed a little more paler then the rest of them if that seemed possible.

"I never said that you did." But I thought it, that was for sure.

"Exactly, you thought it." Can he read minds or something, it's either that or I'm thinking out loud. Jasper tightened his grip around me.

"Okay just to keep my sanity here. Can you read minds?" They all seemed to have a quiet chuckle about what I said. I was a little confused, I was being very serious.

"Yes I can." Well this is perfectly normal, sorry. I apologized in my head.

"Well you never need to ask what I'm thinking about then." I looked to see a small pixie like girl holding onto Edwards arm. She looked different from the others, more innocent. This scared me more. I never trusted innocent looking people. The last Cullen, well I hope it was the last Cullen because if she's not then this is vampire city. Tall, blonde typical pale model. I was guessing this was Rose or what ever her whole name was. She seamed to glare at me, she obviously wasn't keen on me.

"Come on." Jasper pulled me along. My mind had seemed to wonder from what was going on. I had started to replay the first part of underworld. That was a good film; it was one of my favorites.

Once I came out of my mind and focused on the real word, we were already walking up some stairs. We passed an old wooden cross, well there goes the burn in the name of god theory; I wonder if garlic scares them.

"Here we are." He extended his arm in a ta-da fashion.

"And here would be?" He opened the door to a bright white room, it had one red wall which stood with many bookcases against it. A bed which looked to be never slept in was in the corner of a none windowed area. Books were everywhere on the floor, war books, old books, story books… "you have a cook book?" he picked the book which I was staring at.

"No, this isn't mine. Must be Esme's, She thought about taking a job as a cook but she didn't like the mess at the end." I nodded; it seemed Jasper was book boy.

"You like books then?" He nodded; I walked in slowly, avoiding any books that were, trip worthy. I stared around for a moment hoping to see something more familiar to me. Then I saw it, out of all the books here I found one that I knew, Lee and His Army in Confederate History. I remember reading it because my great granddad was in that army and fought in that war. I had a two year obsession with the American civil war. I picked it up, it was in better condition then mine, and I was never good at keeping books in shape.

"Why did you choose that one?" He peered over my shoulder as I read a little bit of the first chapter.

"I've read it before." He took the book out of my hand and gave it a quick scan.

"You like the civil war?" I nodded, that was when I noticed half of the books here were on the civil war. He loved the civil war I guess, or maybe he hated it.

"My great granddad was part of that regiment. My granddad told me about him, so I had a little obsession with the civil war over a two year period. He died when he was like 68 or something. Never actually met him but apparently he liked pie a lot." He chuckled, I walked over and sat on his bed. It was like a giant pillow.

"I may of known him then." I gave him a questioning look. "I was in that exact regiment, I told them I was twenty and got in. soon I was the youngest major in Texas. People like me you see, my father said it was charisma. But since I've changed I've known it was something more. It was the end of the first battle that I became a major." He stared out the window. His face was unreadable; he seamed to rub his arm as if to remember some kind of old pain.

"Then you were changed right?" He nodded.

"My newborn life started a lot different then the rest of my family. You see in the southen area of the world. We aren't as civilized as here, Vampires would fight for an area with large population. New Mexico was a good example but I won't get into that."

"I remember it like it was only days ago. It the reason they don't trust me as much around humans. You see our family only lives on the blood of animals not people. But it didn't always start like that, well for me. I was in a coven were you had to fight to live. I changed humans to vampires sent them out to fight then killed them when they had no use." I was horrified, people being treated like machinery once it's not as useful get a new one. I stared at his skin it was shiner then before.

"It must have been horrible." He walked over to me. And beant down so we were face to face.

"More then you can imagine." I stared at him for a moment then one thought came to mind. I wasn't at all sure whether or not to ask this question but I wanted to know.

"Is it painful? You know the change?" I sighed and stroked my hair in a sympathetic gesture.

"It is the most excruciating thing in the world. Most don't survive the change. Some become suicidal in their pain. But why may I ask would you want to know?" I shrugged, I wouldn't tell him the real reason because I know he would say no.

"Just curious I guess." He kissed me lightly, his mood seem to prick up from depressed to overly happy.

"Don't be getting ideas though." He kissed me again this time with more force. My hand slowly raised it self to his neck. His hand reached nervously for my waist, with a quick movement he pulled me against him. In a feeble attempt I tried to pull him further to the center of the bed.

"What kind of ideas would be allowed?" I asked in a seductive tone.

"Well I'm not sure." He smiled cheekily. I pulled my self back as he crawled onto the bed. I shuffled back as far as I could, till I hit the head board with my back. He crawled over to me, his hand trailed up my bare leg, his face came close to mine. I pulled his face to mine, our lips forced together in a moment of passion. His hand trailing further and further up my leg till he reached the hem of my dress. He pulled back to see my face. I ignored his movement and wrapped my arms around his neck pulled him back to me. We kissed repeatedly only when Jasper would pull away for me to breathe would we stop.

"I'm not the only one with ideas am I?" He chuckled in-between kisses. His ice-cold hand ran further till he reached my bare waist.

"I guess not." He sounded breathless, but he still kissed me with harder force. One of my hands released his neck and trailed down to the top of his shirt. I began to unbutton it one at a time.

"Sorry to barge in." We both froze; I was hoping it was jasper who spoke. Obviously it wasn't he looked behind him and returned to look at me.

"Edward." He growled a little under his breath. His hand slowly removed it self from beneath my dress. I sat up straight, and stared at the bed.

"Esme just finished making some food and was hoping if Alex would want some." Jasper jumped off his bed and turned to me. I nodded and reached out to him, he took my hand with out a second glance.

We followed Edward down stairs and passed the living room. A huge dining table lay in-front of a huge Victorian fireplace. Esme stood cheerily behind of a chair which had food on the table in front.

"I heard you were from England, so I made you some Shepard's pie. You do like that don't you?" I smiled politely hiding my embarrassment from before. I looked to Edward, _Sorry._ I thought to him. He mouthed _its fine_ Back to me.

"I do. Thank you." I sat down, and began to eat. Everyone stared at me as if this was an alien notion.

"Is nobody else going to eat or…" Jasper gave me an obvious look. I remembered what they were. "I forgot your vegetarians." Edward and Esme gave a sigh of relief. I began to eat again, all eye focused on me. _Edward _I thought to myself, _please stop staring. _Everyone began to leave the room after that. Except Jasper, he sat next to me with a disgusted look on his face.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked in annoyance.

"Just human food smells dreadful." He eyed my food once more.

I finished my food quickly, Jaspers annoying stares urged me to finish. "Well I've done, you can stop glaring at me now." He chuckled, something was different this time. His laugh was more fuzzy, suddenly everything started to move of it's own accord. I felt a wave of calm wash over me but that didn't help. Finally the nausea stopped, but it wasn't the end everything went black, the last thing I remember was me falling and Jasper shouting my name.

* * *

I woke up slowly, trees seemed to rise from every direction; the floor beneath me full of dead leaves and mud. I sat up, trying to remember what had happened.

"Alex?" I look towards the sound of my name, Jasper stood in front of me, but something seemed different. His eyes were red and murderous, I backed up a little. It wasn't Jasper, it looked like him but I knew it wasn't. A huge growl escaped his lips, staring behind me as if to kill. I instantly looked to were his gazed led.

I stopped breathing with shock, I couldn't be. I watched her die, I watched her being killed and now she was here. Mum? She smiled at me and opened her arms if to hug me. The growl came again, Jasper had started running towards her, he ran past me and attacked my mother. I stared in pain, shouting her name, screaming at Jasper to stop. It was like I wasn't there, Ignored in pain. I was shaking watching the events come back to me, over and over again. His hand touched my shoulder, his shirt covered in blood, his mouth dripping with the red liquid which he had take from my mother. He beant down as if to kiss me but he passes my face and hesitated. I screamed in pain as he bit me, his teeth breaking my skin the blood pouring into his mouth. I cried in pain, but he didn't seem to care. He let go of me and walked away as if I was just his left over meal. I fell to the floor dying, my eye sight failing. Why did he do this to me? Why did he kill my mother?

**Haha, i got a new way of getting chapters :))) i hope it's a good chapter after everything i went through to get it up on here:)))**


	10. wake up

**Obviously I sadly :( do not own twilight or any of its characters…Stephanie Meyer owns it all, it's not fair :(**

**Chapter 10**

**"We say, we do,**

**The lies, the truth.**

**And all I need is next to me."**

**Mona Lisa- All American rejects**

My eyes flung open without hesitation, everything was white, sunlight burst in. I wasn't sure if I was alive or dead, I wasn't sure if I was either of them. I sat up to see Jasper crouched next to me, he was shaking. I looked to my hands, they looked paler then before. Was it a dream or had Jasper really killed me, killed my mother.

"Jasper?" He turned and looked at me; his eyes were golden, not red. He smiled as he saw me, Carlisle walked into the room at the right time. I rubbed my neck lightly looking for bite marks but nothing.

"Your okay, you frightened the life out of me." Carlisle looked at me, he placed his hand on my forehead; his freezing skin burned my forehead. I wasn't a vampire, I sighed with relief.

"I'm fine, I'm alive." He hugged me, I was happy to feel his coldness in a none "I'm going to eat you" way. I stood up, but my fears weren't over, I had seen them red eyes before. My mother was killed by the owner of those eyes; my mum's killer was a vampire.

"What happened?" I shrugged; I didn't know what did happen I just wanted to go home. Home a place were I felt safe, a place were I can have both Jasper and my dad for protection. Also Edward scared me a little; my head wasn't safe here.

"I think I wanna go home. I've seen enough things to last me a lifetime." He nodded and pulled me along. We said our goodbyes to the family; I made sure Edward could see the dream which I kept thinking about.

"So what did you see while you was out?" we were driving back to mine, he seemed a little depressed by this subject as was I.

"I don't think you want to know." He reached over and held my hand tight, he was still shaking lightly. I must have scared him a lot more then I originally thought.

"I can handle it." His eyes stared at the road, but I could tell his mind was in a different place. He didn't blink once while waiting for my answer.

"Well I was in a forest," He looked at me and ushered me to carry on. "With you." I stared out the window on my side hoping he had stopped listening and forgot the whole subject.

"What did I do?" He hadn't.

"My mum was there too. You weren't the same as you are now though." He gave my hand a gentle squeeze I wasn't sure if it was to comfort me or him.

"You eyes were all red; your faced showed no emotion. You were just so…" he sighed.

"Blanc, evil? He guessed.

"Something like that, you just went passed me and you killed her. You just killed my mother and took her blood. Then you came to me, blood was all over you. You just bent down as if to kiss me but…" I hesitated, I couldn't bring myself to say it the image was to painful to remember.

"I bit you?" I nodded. The car stopped, we were already in front of my house. He looked at me; he placed his hands lightly on my shoulders. "I would never do anything to hurt you, remember that. I would never even consider biting you." He hugged me tightly.

"What if I asked you too?" I had just brought up the wrong question, the worst question ever for a moment like this.

"I wouldn't put you through that pain." I nodded. He tried to hold eye contact with me but I wouldn't give it to him. I opened the car door, and jumped out. Walking alone up to my house seemed weird without Jasper. I wasn't sure if I'd ever walked up here with him or not.

"Do you want me to go?" Jasper appeared at my side, his face pained with being rejected.

"No you can stay but my dad won't let you stay long, but you could always stay the night again. If you wanted." He smiled with relief. It was all I could do to make him happy for the night. I didn't really mind it myself but I wanted him to be happier. My Dad seemed to be in the front room with his flat screen as well. My mother use to say he was having an affair with that thing, he loved it that much. I opened the door, Jasper following at my heels.

"Al, is that you?" He had given me that nickname the day they choose my actual name, well that was what he told me anyways.

"Yeah it's me." I closed the door behind me. Jasper waited patiently by the door, he didn't seem half as nervous as I did. He was quite the opposite of nervous. I hung my coat up and froze in one place, my dad had never met a boy that was with me, I wouldn't know how he would react to him. A pair of cold arms wound around my waist; Jasper held me close to him.

"Why are you so anxious, there's nothing to worry about. If he gets to emotional or whatever I'll calm him down." He kissed my neck softly.

"What do you have some amazing calming super power." He chuckled lightly.

"Pretty much, it may not be as good as mind reading but it's pretty darn useful," Well now he has super power, next he'll say he can fly and start wearing red boxers over his pants. I took a breath, Jasper turned so he could see my face. "You need to calm down a bit." He whispered.

At that moment I felt waves of calmness spread over me, all my worries evaporated away. I felt more confident. "Thanks." He kissed me gently before pulling away and grinning at me.

"Come on, I would like to meet your family." I rolled my eyes in a sarcastic motion. I pulled him along boosted by my new found confidence. As I came into the room my confidence dropped, I froze in fear. My Dad stared at me looking confused.

"Who's he?" he looked at me then at Jasper. I tried to speak but words wouldn't arrive.

"I'm Jasper Hale sir." He stood up and walked intimidating towards him. They shook hands and exchanged glances.

"Dr Cullen's kid?" Jasper nodded, nothing bad was happening so far. "He's a good man that one. I hope you're a lot like him." He returned to his chair and started his daily flick-through-a-thousand-channels routine. I pulled Jasper out the room, I never was that close with my dad. I wouldn't want to stay in the same room as him with Jasper, or any boy for that matter.

"See that wasn't too bad was it?" I shook my head lightly; he followed me up the stairs silently. The mood had change since we had seen my dad it wasn't as cheery in a way. We reached my bedroom, we were both mute. I sat on my bed and began to mess with the hem of my dress.

"Are you okay?" He bent down in front of me, I could still see a little pain in his eyes, probably from having images of him killing me.

"I'm fine." He lifted my head with the tip of his finger.

"If you say so." He stood up and looked around my room. There were many posters of bands that I loved. He stared at the largest poster, my Madina Lake poster. He looked back to me, I just shrugged in response. I wasn't paying much attention to him, I was thinking more about my strange dream and its meaning.

"Alex, cheer up. There's nothing to be down about. The dream wasn't real and didn't mean anything." Yeah it didn't mean anything just that my mother was killed by one of the nasty vampires. He walked over to me when I didn't answer back to him, he kissed me soothingly.

"You know kissing me won't always make things better." He kissed me again this time hu cupped my face in his hands.

"Is it working now?" I giggled quietly.

"Yes, it's working now." I pulled him back to kiss me; thankfully he did what I wanted. I pulled myself back into the centre of my bed. "Have you ever read Romeo and Juliet?" He stared at me, he was confused by my random question.

"Yes, what about it?" He crawled onto my bed with me; he stayed a small distance from me.

"It didn't end well. I just don't wanna end up like that." He chuckled.

"We won't because for one our families don't hate each of us and why would you pretend to die anyways?" I shrugged defeated, he was right. I wouldn't kill myself. He gave me a menacing grin.

"I'll see you tonight?" I nodded but I was curious as to why he had to leave. He stood by my window; I hadn't noticed he'd moved. He pointed to his eyes, they were almost black. I nodded, he needed to hunt.

When I had said goodbye to Jasper I went downstairs to join my dad.

"Alex, could you do me a favour?" I stared at him; hopefully It wouldn't be too bad.

"Yeah, sure." He stood up and went into the kitchen. He came back holding a very large fishing pole.

"Could you take this back up to Billy Black's house? He lent it me a few days ago, hadn't had the chance to return it. He lives on the reservation." I sighed, great anther trip to a place with many trees. I took the fishing rod and headed out side into my range rover. I headed off to what I was hoping would be an uneventful trip.

**Hopefully my next chapter will be more eventful with a certain wolf perhaps :))))**


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